Reviews

Phantom

76% Uncertain Gitargodz Suk Tour ’85 cassette

This blazing 20-song cassette was recorded live on the band’s summer tour, and features a well-rounded sampling of the band’s old and new material—with a vast majority to be released. Production and mix are clear, and holds a hard edge which adds that great “live” feel to the band’s music and vocals. Recommended.

Aldi Ost Aldi Ost cassette

Seven songs of mid-tempo, surf-infused hardcore punk from Berlin. Catchy, memorable songs with vocals occasionally sounding a bit like Keith Morris. ALDI OST seems to be pissed for all the right reasons, poking fun at security guards, hating cops, griping about SUVs, and on my favorite track of theirs, coming down on the drug-fueled toxicity of rigid, emotionless “Masculinity.” Their self-proclaimed “male-fronted punk” angle and the pin-up centerfold-style sticker of the singer included with the tape definitely gave me a little chuckle. Very solid debut cassette and I can’t wait to hear more!

Battra// 2014–2017 LP

German bass-and-drums powerviolence that sounds like a cross between SPAZZ and GODSTOMPER. The songs have enough variety to sound fresh, often moving from blastbeats to heavy breakdowns and back again. You will be rewarded if you speak German because there are plenty of samples from what sounds like news reports, films, and even Alpine folk songs—this is a release full of personality. The vocal stylings are…unique. The lead vocals are traditional multi-syllable-per-second hollered PV fare, but the backing vocals sound like a guttural “OohoOohOoh.” Imagine a drunken Frankenstein’s monster wearing a Tankcrimes hat, and you get the idea. At first, I was like “WTF is this?” but then it actually started to grow on me and rip pretty hard. Caveman-core one-upped? There are plenty of highlights on this compilation of tracks, including a heavy psych groove on “You Only Lobotomize Once” that sounds like prime LIGHTNING BOLT, tongue-in-cheek autotuned vocals on “Kräftemethen,” and filthy jet noise distortion on “Blümeranz.” Check it out from one of the million labels that helped with the release.

Brezel und Anton Spielen Pisse 7″

Here, BREZEL UND ANTON offer two tracks and an answer to a question nobody asked: what would the music in a cheesy, ’60s Hollywood haunted house sound like if it were on an alien planet (where the aliens also speak German)? Oh, you have asked yourself that question? Well, you’re probably going to be excited about this. I, on the other hand, was asking when I would reach the exit of this martian house of wonders. Perhaps these two tracks would feel more effective if they were way shorter—get in, weird everyone out a bit with quick bursts of off-kilter spaghetti western synth, and get out—but at almost seven-and-a-half minutes, the experiment simply overstays its welcome.

Das Das Leben in Bildschirmen cassette

Roughly translated as “Life in Screens,” this cassette is the Berlin’s synth duo’s second album, released earlier in the year. What a wonderful piece of plastic. DAS DAS creates a world where simple, screeching synth lines amalgamate to create little punk gems that you can sing along to (if you know German) and/or dance to, whether on a dark, cavernous club night or in your bedroom on a Saturday night. Their sound is clearly ’80s-oriented; we could mention bands like FUTURISK or KAS PRODUCT, although by the noisy use of the guitar and the playfulness of their melodies, they remind me more of the Spanish AVIADOR DRO. Great bands to be in the company of, in my opinion. Big mention to “Invisible Man,” a brutal and sexy song, like a kind of seductive psychobilly EBM. Eight excellent songs that exploit the libidinal energy of dance as a political tool of emancipation.

Dewaere Slot Logic LP

The record kicks off sounding a little like a loungey take on the MISFITS, and then moves into heavy rock with theatrical vocal delivery somewhat in the vein of the STROKES. The entire recording is drenched in a heavy coating of static fuzz and reverb. It’s big and dirty and you probably know if that’s the kind of thing that gets you going.

Dispo Rauchen Macht Heroinabhängig cassette

After a killer trash-punk opener, DISPO switches gears and drops a track that comes off like Cows and Beer-era KREUZEN bashing out modern garage punk. It’s a great combination of sub-genre influences—hardcore, darker ’80s Deutsch punk, wild garage hooks, and snotty ’70s NYC art are all represented in a release that doesn’t sound like it owes anything to anyone.

Doc Flippers Human Pork LP

Second full-length from this Leipzig quintet, and it’s quite a confounding one. The eleven songs on Human Pork ping-pong from power pop to cowpunk to post-hardcore to dirge-y downer punk, with little holding things together beyond a mid-fi production and a persistent warble effect that seems to be thrown on pretty much everything. Oddly enough, though, that’s kind of enough to make this feel like a cohesive release. Still, it certainly has its ups and downs. The power pop tracks on here are some of the catchiest I’ve heard this decade—give “Steel Splinters” or “Celine Doom” a spin and try to not sing them to yourself as soon as you turn the record off. And “Human Pork” is one of the best bile-spitting downer punk numbers that I’ve heard since the demise of BLACK PANTIES. On the other hand, I’m absolutely all set on these “early COUNTRY TEASERS meets circusy egg-punk” tracks. On paper it sounds like it might be fine, but nah. And I don’t know that I’ve wanted to unhear a song more than I do “Stiffy Girl.” Woof!

Egg Idiot Best of LOL LP

Leipzig-based 8-bit mayhem egg-punkers who even loop coughs and sneezes for one of their tracks. Quite interesting egg-punk filled with electro sounds, dubbed and effected voices talking to each other, and really good synths and keyboard work. Hits all of the spots in the “never seeming to stop” sense in each song.

Ex-White Disco cassette

Nasty, weird, driving, gross, shit-eating punk from Germany. Musically this rips. The catchy clean guitar licks really get stuck in your head, and some of the songs are awesome, specifically “It’s Me, The Shit” and “Hooray Henry.” On some of the songs, the barked vocals are a bit overly affected which makes them come off teetering on the brink of being novelty songs, which, depending on how that statement rubs you, can be viewed as a positive thing. The lyrics that I can decipher are just dumb enough to make me scratch my head wondering why the hell I didn’t think of them. “I want to piss in your face, I want to beat you with my bat.”

F.E.I.D.L. Wödmusik LP

Definitely not your typical punk record! F.E.I.D.L., a trio out of Vienna, follows up their 2020 7” with their debut LP—eleven tracks of oddball punk miscellanea. The record starts off with some barnyard animal noises then launches into a jaunty little intro that’s part BRIAN SETZER ORCHESTRA, part circus screamer. Maybe not exactly what I’m looking for in a punk record, but it’s an interesting detour and things seem to settle down quickly enough. The next two tracks are pretty straightforward, reverb-heavy garage punk numbers—they sound like an amalgam of Males-era INTELLIGENCE, TY SEGALL, and the stuff VISION 3D is putting out. It’s pretty good stuff! “Gusch” starts off in the same vein for maybe one of the most ripping tracks on the record, but then takes a hard left turn into, like, warped Balkan folk music. Subsequent tracks touch on anything from  MAN OR ASTRO-MAN?-styled ragers to numbers that wouldn’t sound out of place on a post-Swordfishtrombones TOM WAITS album. This strikes me as something that would really appeal to folks who worship at the altar of Mike Patton. For the rest of us, when it’s good, it’s good. When it’s bad, it sounds like GOGOL BORDELLO.

F.E.I.D.L. Glaub Da Nix EP

F.E.I.D.L. is a garage-y post-punk band from Vienna. They play repetitive beats topped with fuzzy guitars. The bass and drums stomp out a catchy, yet mechanical locomotive chug. Based solely on their sound the vocals seem frank and earnest. I have no idea what they are saying so they could be really sarcastic and silly which would make me happy. Mixing all of that together F.E.I.D.L. gives off a detached type of cool noise that’s appealing to my ears.

Fear Itself Till Death Do Us Part LP

Brutal ravenous thrash with a metallic influence (mostly in the structures and leads) and lyrics concerning personal, political and horrific topics. The only setback is the noisy production which squelches the power a bit, but this still blazes.

Fix Welcome EP

Late-night sparking-wire punk from Germany. Lotsa dark, druggy, death-disco kind of shit goin’ on here, some of it compelling, some of it falling awfully flat. The grind and production throughout are indebted to more industrial sounds as opposed to straight punk. Ultimately unmemorable but containing one or tune choice spurts.

Fix More is More LP

Naturally, when you see the name FIX, most of you will probably think of the Detroit hardcore band, and a smaller percentage will wonder why the extra “X” is missing from those new wavers that wrote “One Thing Leads to Another.” You would be wrong on both accounts in this case, and while finding any info on this band was nigh impossible, I wasn’t disappointed by these Germans’ full-throttle garage punk. Every song mows you down with strictly down-strummed, tightly-wound power chord riffs, and the drummer’s wrists must be bionic with all those relentless RAMONES-ian hi-hats. If you love the MARKED MEN template but also sprechen sie Deutsch, then it may behoove you to seek out this record.

Gym Tonic Good Job LP

Phantom has reissued the synth punk reveling Good Job, originally out on Et Mon Cul C’est Du Tofu? in 2019. This debut has its moments of quiet, slow wandering, apparent on “Hiroshima,” with mod-wheel-driven synth lines and spoken word, but moreover turns up with dance beats on the likes of “Tourists of Death,” which is catchy by the end of the first listen. These dark song subjects made me feel as if I had GYM TONIC pinned, then they slip in egg-punk tracks like “Car Sick” and “B12 Injection.” And did I mention they’re named after an ’80s French workout show? Needless to say, they’ll keep you guessing! Can’t get enough? Also out on Phantom is their new Sanitary Situations EP.

Gym Tonic Sanitary Situations 12″

A quartet of Berlin-based grown-up punks bring us their second release, and it’s clear from the six tracks on here that they’re having a good time. Do you need to pick up a copy? Depends on how much you love perfectly adequate garage-y synth punk. Imagine something between LOST SOUNDS’ maniacal darkwave and SERVOTRON’s stilted robot rock, maybe mixed with a little contemporary egginess. Honestly, it could be worse. It’s also kind of educational, like a German synth punk THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS!  Did you know you could catch mono from someone’s tears? I certainly didn’t until listening to this record.

Highway Patrol On a Sensual Ride LP

Just looking at the cover art and hearing the first few chords, I am almost certain there are going to be things I like about this record and things I really don’t like. The intro to the first song is taking too long, bordering on self-indulgence. Not a fan of that. On the other hand, I kind of like the soft female vocals. And now it’s starting to go sideways for me. It’s a little too bluesy and a little too 1973. The second cut sounds like a variation of the first cut. I feel like I should be sarcastically snapping my fingers and swaying my head from side to side. There are a couple of tracks that work for me, those with a more rocking or more country feel. Overall, it’s just not cutting it for me.

Isolationsgemeinschaft Der Tanz Geht Weiter! LP

This is wonderful and kinda hilarious all at the same time. It totally makes me think of that old Saturday Night Live sketch, “Sprockets” (YouTube that shit). It’s so German that it’s almost a parody. Really well-done synth punk, dance, post-punk…whatever. I guess it could be called coldwave these days, but unlike those poseurs, these guys are really German. For fans of COLD CAVE, KRAFTWERK, NERVOUS GENDER, etc. Now we dance.

John, Paul, George, Ringo & Richard Das ist die Zukunft, Aber Nicht Deine! LP

I can’t imagine this band name would work if you went with anything other than “Richard.” “Richard” just has this poncy air about it that really sells this dumb joke. Anyway, this project is the work of a single person—presumably a Richard—who’s been at it since about 2016. He peddles an oddball mix of noise, minimalist avant-pop, dub, yé-yé, downtempo electronica, and space age bachelor pad music. It’s out there, man! Depending on the track, it can sound like a more listener friendly MEN’S RECOVERY PROJECT, a less wacky MR. BUNGLE (Disco Volante-era), or, like, the entire Ralph Records roster covering the poppier cuts from CABARET VOLTAIRE’s Red Mecca. Dude may be a Dick, but he made a cool record. This is the future, but not yours!

Ex-White / LASSIE split cassette

LASSIE starts things out with three cuts, which remind me of early DEVO in many ways; they’ve got an electronic element, they’re catchy, and they’re a tad bit odd. I also like all three tracks quite a bit. Make no mistake about it, this is punk rock. EX WHITE follows things up with four cuts of their own. Faster paced and without the same level of electronics, they’ve got a similar sound in the sense that it’s a tad bit odd and it’s extremely catchy. This is definitely worth looking for, but the Bandcamp page indicates that it’s sold out.

LASSIE Behold LP

Are you sexually attracted to the bat on this record cover? Yeah…I’m not either—definitely not drawn into its sexy, sexy eyes. Anyway, Leipzig fun punkers Lassie are back! This time in LP form. You’re getting thirteen tracks of mutant robot rock, combining the downstroke dum-dum sounds of the SPITS, the punk-pop of the Dirtnap roster, and the kitchy sci-fi fun of the REZILLOS. It’s party punk played with a sense of urgency that I bet would make for a wild-ass live show. A real good time!

LASSIE Collected Cassettes LP

As the title says, this is two cassettes now enshrined on vinyl. The A-side is 2017’s Yes! Like the Dawg and the B-side is 2019’s Just A Couple of Dudes. LASSIE is having a great time blasting out songs like “Phonecalls On My Deathbed” and “Deposit Bottles.” The vocals remind me of DEVO while the music has a amateurish ’60s feel. It’s silly and entertaining poppy garage rock that is also well played and catchy as heck. Just a plain old good time for band member and listener alike.

Laxisme Premiere Sortie cassette

Fast, fun, and loaded with energy, LAXISME delivers a five-song cassette that is a little poppy, a little hardcore, and completely infectious. With bluesy howls to round out the choruses, I am already singing along to the French and German that I don’t know, wishing I were pushing through their crowd. Phantom seems to have their ear pressed firmly to the Berlin underground, and I hope they keep listening. More, please!

Meat Shirt Army of Dolphins EP

French punks who take the risky approach of throwing different styles at the wall to see what sticks, with surprisingly strong results. The first few tracks have a straight-ahead USHC sound with shouted vocals and chord progressions that sound like early BLACK FLAG. There are hints of other things going on as well though, such as gang vocals on “Sugar” and “Watching You!” that evoke the melodic youth crew of INSTED. Layers of guitars build into alt/psych walls on “Burning Bilderburg” and the ending of “Watching You!,” and “Army of Dolphins” is a flanged-out psych swirl that is as satisfying as it is bewildering among the surrounding hardcore. I am usually wary of bands incorporating too much into their sound to the point that it thins out the overall effect, but MEAT SHIRT does it right and delivers a compelling EP.

Melt Downer III cassette

Heavy rocking release from this Austrian band that nestles somewhere between post-hardcore and noise rock. Initially sounding like METZ and PISSED JEANS, these eight songs take so many interesting left turns that I never could guess what was coming next. “Gross White” has hardcore riffing with hollered reverbed vocals but quickly jettisons that for shimmering, atonal passages reminiscent of vintage SONIC YOUTH. “Corporate Identity” is built around such a massive doom riff that it sounds like the Earth cracking open to swallow lesser bands. Mike Pike wishes he wrote this; it’s that good. It then shifts through multiple time changes with spoken vocals before bringing the heaviness back. “Earth 2″ brings us shout-along, non-melodic hardcore/bummer punk, which leads into “Massive,” a song with an extended polyrhythmic drum exercise and long feedback solo. There is some gnarled start/stop action here that spoke sweet nothings to my inner metalhead. Final track “Kind” is almost twelve minutes of what these folks do best, while the vocalist intones “Get to the point” over and over. Kind of a troll, maybe? Doesn’t matter—it’s worth the noisy punishment. Great release and highly recommended.

Novotny TV Tod, Pest, Verwesung LP

This is a reissue of this German band’s 1996 album. Musically, it’s all over the place: kinda surf-y, rock’n’roll-y, twangy, mixed with ironic (?) crossover riffing. The vocals sound strained and intense: spitting lyrics that are critical, ironic, and “funny.” If you don’t understand German, this might be your new fave band, as they sound like CRAZY SPIRIT’s boring cousins that didn’t go to art school but are instead trapped in the most tedious of suit-and-tie office jobs. If you understand German, you’ll need to be a fan of humorous punk lyrics that rhyme.

Novotny TV Das Volk Sind Wirr LP

There’s just an absolute smorgasbord of styles at work throughout this album, originally released in 1997 and made available again for new millennium punx courtesy of Phantom and Honhie Records. The basic sound is garage-y punk, but there are touches of hardcore crunch and speed, ska, and straight-up rock’n’roll as well. The singer has the kind of charismatic, Jello-esque squeal you’d kind of expect a band like this to feature. A farfisa-style organ comes and goes, not always aligning with the garage-y numbers. The covers, of the FLESHEATERS and “TV Party,” are very representative of the album’s sound as a whole. Personally, I found it exhausting around the halfway point but if this sounds like your jam, then hey, it’s easy to get again, and there are plenty available.

Nowaves Good for Health Bad for Education LP

This is darkness in the right way. What I mean to say is that NOWAVES sound like they exist in a shroud and/or shrouded by smoke—sounds composed in the physical and metaphorical recesses, presentation that struggles to harness a primitive determination. NOWAVES will certainly appeal to goth revivalists with cuts like “Empty Sorrows” that focus on the synth and that ’80s dancefloor swing, but it’s all in the context of a record that mostly lands somewhere between EA80/GRAUZONE and WIPERS. Although the record is not overly layered, I notice something new every time I listen (WARREN ZEVON meets the CURE vibe on the title track, for example), which only encourages me to listen more.

Nowaves Immaculate Protection cassette

There’s no denying the influence of UK post-punk and new wave here. Most of what you’ll hear on Immaculate Protection could have come right off the streets of ’70s Manchester. The pop sensibilities are adorned with all the peculiar sounds and sharp, treble-touched guitar of that period. I was happy to see the band muddy some of that shine, though. They occasionally mutate their melodies enough to maintain a dark, uneasy tone. Together with the singer’s almost monotone delivery, NOWAVES keep the revelry and angst flowing.

Nowaves Good for Health Bad for Education cassette

Moody post-punk meets warbly new wave on this Dresden band’s first album from 2019. The ten mid-tempo tracks don’t break any new ground, but they maintain an atmosphere that is gloomy without feeling hopeless. Imagine the disaffected vocals of INTERPOL and the coldwave spirit of NORMA LOY with bits of exotica (“89/90”), woozy synths, and co-ed vocal interplay (“Dark Side (of the Moon)”) for good measure. A low-key, consistent album with enough variety to keep it interesting all the way through.

Nowaves Odd Secrets LP

Driving post-punk synth from Dresden with the dark sparsity of COMSAT ANGELS or BAUHAUS, but with the lyrical creativity of NICO’s The Marble Index. The JOY DIVISION comparisons will be made, but they have their own original dark surf vibe going. The album has a danceable goth-pop sound, and the ten tracks grow more with each listen for a solid release.

OK Satán Fatal Insomniac cassette

The first thing I noticed about this Danish two-piece was the drums, or lack thereof. It sounds like someone pressed the default percussion button on a Casio keyboard and then played mostly mid-tempo hardcore over it. If they’re taking it seriously, I guess I should too, because this tape pleasantly surprised me. The cheapo drums are accompanied by heavy punk chords and damaged, LUMPY-with-a-sore-throat vocals. There is an occasional tinny solo and some feedback screech that make songs like “People are People” (especially with its sarcastic  spoken vocals) sound like SACCHARINE TRUST-style weirdo HC. Throw in fast ragers like “Stay on Drugs” (“Stay on drugs / And don’t do school”) and “I Don’t Care,” and you have a solid band worth keeping an eye on. Oh, and I like the cover art. Those tigers look cool.

ÖPNV ÖPNV cassette

Primitive bass/drum/keys proto-darkwave that sounds (and is) undeniably German. Everything here is cold; even the forceful tracks like “Trabantenstadt,” with its sharp, barked vocals, sound drunk and trepidatious. Throw a Cosey-caliber damaged trumpet into “Rasthof” to top off an excellent offering that demands more listens and deeper exploration.

ÖPNV Deutsch Funk Revolte LP

It’s really all there in the album title. This Berlin band delivers a solid collection of cold post-punk songs with early industrial elements, and it’s pretty great. Several tracks have spoken word intros, and most all begin with heavy, distorted bass grooves and electronic drums. The vocals and production sound like EINSTÜRZENDE NEUBAUTEN with some THROBBING GRISTLE at their most “Hot on the Heels of Love,” and several tracks feature a dying no wave trumpet twisted in the swirling synths. “Einzeltäter” dips into Euro techno but never loses its cool, perfect for a Berlin dorm room or a dancefloor. “Blockiert” is the closest to traditional punk, via the SUICIDE synth-and-drums route. Its crackling three-note riff and pounding kick drums combo is as economical as it is heavy. A simple and effective stomper to end a strong album. Sehr gut!

ÖPNV ÖPNV cassette

Five songs of plodding, synth-heavy punk from Germany. Mid-tempo and dirgy, this falls somewhere in my mind between post-punk and slower peace punk stuff like POISON GIRLS. I really dig it. The strange occasional synthesizer blip-bloops are really cool and kind of push this over the top for me. Between the stuff here on Phantom Records and the handful of things I’ve gotten to review on Billo Records, it seems Germany has a wide array of killer stuff going on currently and I am thirsty for more.

Pisse Jammertal / Vetschau 7″

Synth-laced indie jams out of Germany. Really dreamy and crisp, yet rustic and raw. Rhythm section tightly drives each track while the guitar layers an ethereal atmosphere throughout. The A-side kicks things off with a theremin solo, which in itself is impressive as most people don’t have a clue how to use those things. Reminds me of all those twee bands from the early ’00s like the SHOUT OUT LOUDS and CLAP YOUR HANDS SAY YEAH. Nothing really groundbreaking here, but it’s a pleasant couple of songs if you dig this type of thing.

Pisse Lambada EP

“Komfortzone,” the opening track on the new EP from this HoyerswerdaI band, is exactly how you should do the whole “punk band plus a synth” thing. If you absolutely must involve a synth, let it play a supporting role—maybe have it provide a bit of atmosphere, potentially elevate your solid but pretty straightforward garage-y post-punk (or whatever) to something a little different, something interesting. PISSE maybe don’t strike the exact balance I’m looking for on each of the seven tracks here, but they do so more often than not, turning this into a much more memorable affair than it would have been had there not been a synth. It’s a cool record—give it a go!

Ponys Auf Pump Wirt Schon Wieder LP

Big surf rock guitars, synth leads, kazoos, riot grrrl power, and…was that a recorder? I don’t know what’s going on here—but I like it. “Kleine Maus” is maybe my favorite pick of the album, as it builds with fast guitar chops and big bass to a sing-along chorus with falsetto backing. Wirt Schon Wieder is the second full-length album from Berlin based PONYS AUF PUMP, and another gem brought to us by Phantom.

Ponys Auf Pump Probezeit EP

Energetic synth punk with a progressive garage vibe from Germany, exuding histrionic vocals and a classic garage-y guitar sound that I really dig. Sufficiently soft synths that work great with the string section, where the garage vibes truly flourish. Suggested track: “Bullenschwein.” A good merging of new wave sounds and a less gloomy than usual type of German post-punk closer to rock.

B’schißn / Ponys Auf Pump Split LP

PONYS AUF PUMP fall in the BÄRCHEN UND DIE MILCHBUBIS style (particularly the vocals!!) with added punker/waver synths, which is to say they write sharp punk hits that seem effortless and snotty and a good time?! Super catchy and pleasurable! B´SCHIÁŸN are more scrappy, not as immediately appealing, more fucked up sounding, def have that eternal Euro art squat punk attack. Both bands complement each other which is all you can ask for from a split! I thought this was cooler than it looks, the art is sorta goofy?!

Rouge Rouge LP

Providing a seemingly endless supply of attention grabbing music, Phantom keeps the bar high with ROUGE’s debut LP. With nothing to scale it, I thought the cover photo was a crack pipe, but liner notes explain that it was a homemade bat crafted from a shopping cart handle that was used “during riots after a demonstration against the financial policy of the European Central Bank in Frankfurt”—while this sets the tone for the abrasive music within, the lyrics definitely fall less on the political and more on the personal. Take for example the caustic “I take pictures of myself ‘cause I need destruction / Give me a zero or a ten” from “Images,” or the scathingly self-critical “01 / 01” unabashedly singing “Friendships turned out unstable / Cold coffee cups on the kitchen table / Months passed—it felt like dreaming.” Post-punk is clearly on display here with these personal lyrics, paired with a front-of-the-mix grumbling bass and reverb-heavy guitars. Don’t miss the boat on this latest offering from Berlin’s ROUGE.

Rouge Rouge cassette

This has got to be like my sixth review for this label in as many months. We get it—y’all like music! Just make sure you continue putting out good shit if you want me to keep up this pace. Speaking of good shit, allow me to introduce to you ROUGE, a new four-piece out of Berlin who meld the new wave shimmy of the first B-52’S album with the drippy garage punk of THEE OH SEES’ The Master’s Bedroom is Worth Spending a Night In LP. The six tracks on this cassette kinda teeter between being more overtly punk and post-punk, but they all have a consistently gloomy vibe and a fairly unique sound overall! I’m into it!

Sad Neutrino Bitches Weltraumendspurt EP

Dare I say that this freaky record sounds a little like CRASS’ “Bata Motel” if it didn’t take itself nearly as seriously, took a bunch of psychedelic drugs, and decided to be on a rock’n’roll EP. Just focus on the vocals and the drums. Some less out-there references land in the neighborhood of a more gleeful version of BLATZ or the CRUCIFUCKS. I think the band says it best themselves: “The songs are about being ugly, being pissed, being not clever or too sad to fuck.” True weirdos fully embracing the meaning of punk and gifting this gem upon us as a mere side-effect of their rapture.

Schiach 2 LP

Over the last five years, there’s been no shortage of TOTAL CONTROL-type bands on the international scene. I’m here to tell you that SCHIACH is one of the finer such units. Maybe that’s because their influences stretch all the way back to the original German post-punk scene and they utilize drum machines as effectively as they use guitars. In accordance with the genre, 2 is packed full of paranoia. All manner of clanking sounds ricochet around the agitated vocals, often sounding like a parody of industrial-influenced club music; a lo-tech MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT, perhaps. But instead of sending up Christianity and hard rock, SCHIACH seems to be mocking modern surveillance culture, and that’s something this reviewer can get behind.

Splizz Splizz cassette

Another wonderful offering from Phantom—Berlin, Germany-based SPLIZZ takes a page out of the ’80s post-punk book, maybe something like the SOUND with rougher edges. Not totally sure what they’re getting on about, except for “Bored” which is sung in English, but the mix is great with bass way up front, dueling male/female vocals, and shimmering guitar riffs. This follows their first EP from 2019 (also self-titled) and comes out at a time when Western European post punk is in full-fledged revival. That said, SPLIZZ stands out to my ears, and has all the makings for greatness (or maybe I just can’t get enough of this type of thing)—you decide.

Dispo / Telesatan split LP

Both TELESATAN and DISPO feature a lot of feedback, clamor, and fuzz. TELESATAN plays fun, conventional punk defined by a big farty bass sound, cymbal crashes, and screeching guitars. The vocalists scream, yowl and taunt (think BLATZ’s side of Shit Split). Occasionally they slow to a FLIPPER-like crawl. DISPO’s songs continue in this vein. Both bands balance out the noise with catchy riffs and choruses.

Telesatan Behave! cassette

Behave!, the latest cassette release from Leipzig’s TELESATAN, consists of eight tracks of fuzzed-out, noisy garage punk, at times reminiscent of FLIPPER or even something along the lines of FYP or the Recess Records catalog. Fun, mid-paced, driven punk rock with a tinge of post-punk elements.

The Deadly Hume Passenger Blues / Bed as Big as a Boat 7″

This band has a big tribal beat like GUN CLUB, punctuated with heavy, fuzz soaked swoops that kind of recall the BIRTHDAY PARTY. There’s real tension throughout where it seems the band is as confused as you as to where they’re going next in the song.

The Kelpies Take Me Away / Second by Second 7″

This reissue (?) of an early 80’s Aussie punk single by the KELPIES shows a studio approach to the same restrained punk style that was showcased in their recent posthumous live LP. The guitar work is rather like CHELSEA, the two compositions here pleasant but not earthshaking.

Universum Heavy Metal Gefahr LP

This is really fucking great and totally not punk at all. Featuring member(s) of German punk band PISSE (not Piss) and some other Berlin bands I’m not familiar with. Not sure if this is a parody, tribute, or what, but the album and title track is “Heavy Metal Danger” and, by all means, that is what you get here. Totally channeling early ACCEPT (you know, the band with the five-foot growling German lawn gnome in bondage gear singer) and also going into some proggish territory of Taken By Force-era SCORPIONS and early-ish UFO when they first went metal. Raging wind-in-your-hair, blazing-down-the-Autobahn heavy metal insanity—not for wimps. There’s a few post-punker moments and baselines on songs like “Nightcrawling Boneheads,” but this is 99% not for shorthairs. Put up signs of the horns here.

V/A There’s a Method to Our Madness LP

A great collection of mostly unreleased tracks from North American bands like LUDICHRIST, DISORDERLY CONDUCT, SACRED DENIAL, ASSAULT, PSYCHO, and many, many more. There are a few speed-metal riffs here, but the common denominator is speed. Aggressive speed-thrash attack.

YC-CY Wake Me Up Again EP

Phantom Records continues their mission to blanket the globe in oddball releases from the deepest recesses of the European punk underground. This time, we’re treated to some harsh synth punk from Switzerland. YC-CY has apparently been at it since the mid-2010s, but this four-song EP is the first I’m hearing from them. They play an odd mix of Ed Banger-esque maximalist French House, 2-step/UK garage, EBM, and melancholic darkwave. Tracks are constructed around drone-y but melodic baritone vocals buried under blankets of electronic squall. Imagine the SERFS, DAF, and KAVINSKY playing at the same time on top of a BOY HARSHER record. It’s not bad, and I certainly applaud their efforts to be this annoying while playing something this unpopular. But I doubt I’ll be dipping back in.